“Some people require less warm up than others, so noticing sensations and relaxing matter a lot more than the specific length of time you play for. “Just be gradual in everything you do,” Ligon advises. However, it won’t exercise your sphincter the same way that active play with a toy does, which is more similar to the sensations of anal sex with a penis. If penetration isn’t your preferred training method, you can wear a butt plug for an extended period of time to get accustomed to the fullness of penetrative anal sex. This will help ease your anus into the sensation of penetration at a speed and depth your body is most comfortable with. When starting out, keep the toy inserted for roughly five seconds, remove it, and repeat 10 times for three sets. Once you're a little in, gentle swirling or side-to-side, up-and-down motions can help relax you further.” “That way you aren't ramming something against your sphincter and you're able to massage it open more gently. “Tipping-in works much better than trying to insert something at a perpendicular 90-degree angle,” Ligon says. There is no such thing as too much lube, so apply it generously to both your finger/toy and your hole (for optimal comfort, invest in a lube injector to reach deeper in the anus), then slowly insert your finger or device until you feel even the slightest resistance. Fetch the lube, sweetie, It’s time to get your hole some exercise. Since sex with partners outside the home is prohibited, now is the time to be productive and train for the fateful day when you’re able to take a real life dick again. This, on top of a sex ed curriculum that ignores queer people, means many of us have had to learn about sex through experience or word of mouth, which can be both dangerous and traumatic.įor the column’s inaugural entry, I thought it wise to choose a subject applicable to our current circumstance. When I came out, something I noticed straight out of the closet was the lack of legitimate sexual resources for queer people. Welcome to Gay Sex Ed, Grindr’s sex column for responsible, credibly-sourced sexual information for men who have sex with men (MSM). Now, many years later, the app that pushed me to explore my sexuality is giving me the opportunity to do the same for others and, honestly, I couldn’t be more thrilled. So one night after a few too many vodka-Gatorades (don’t judge), I created a Grindr profile, complete with one-just one-photo of my headless torso, as most questioning men in the suburbs do. I mean, I thought I was gay, but I’d never dated or been intimate with a man before.